Morning

Mornings are scarier than the boogie monster. At least death by monster isn't a sure thing.

Ah, mornings. They're not all created equal, you know. In fact, this is the time of year when the most sinister mornings come out of the closet. You know what I'm talking about.

Daylight savings time.

It sounds so innocuous. But really, DST is the key ingredient that turns a mundane "Wake up! The sun is shining!" morning into the "Wake up! It's still night, but you gotta get up!" kind of morning. It then proceeds to give me a nudge and a wink as I fumble for my watch in disbelief.

Some of you probably think I'm at the wrong end of the year. DST is supposed to give us more light in the morning, not less. Right?

Technically, yes.

But you're forgetting something. What goes around comes around. DST isn't here forever. Come March 10th of next year, it'll vanish.

And what does that mean for us poor souls who have just become accustomed to the dawn's early light? Darkness. Cold. Misery--each capital letter fully deserved. So, you see, mornings and boogie monsters have something else in common.

Apprehension.

Ah, November. I haven't really missed you. If it weren't for Turkeys and the general festivity that surrounds Thanksgiving and Christmas, I would probably move to some place with maximum sunlight... and no B. Franklin inspired time-shifting maneuvers. A Caribbean island would be a good start.

Because now, even though the sun is shining, I know it's going to leave me, just when I need it the most. When the winter doldrums are over, and the days are getting longer, and I'm breathing a sigh of relief that the worst is over... then, and only then, will DST drop me like a hot potato and ride off into the sunset laughing manically.

A fan of DST... I... am... not.

There's an alternative solution, of course. Why not just stay in bed until the sun rises? An excellent question. By December 21st, Oregonians will enjoy a mere eight hours and forty-two minutes of sunlight per day. While you're soaking in that depressing thought, consider the complementary truth: there'll be fifteen hours and eighteen minutes of potential sleep-time per day as well.

Fifteen hours of sleep. Whoa.

Assuming you don't need to do bothersome things like work or social time, this might be the biggest revelation of your life. In fact, if you suffer from ursus tendencies, this might be the one excuse you needed to start hibernating through the winter. Think about it. What's worse... being a well-rested bear or a sun-deprived human?

:raises hand to the former question:

Until next time,
- Daniel