Courtship, Infatuation, and Protein Powder

What is love? What is infatuation? How are these concepts viewed within the conservative homeschooling community? Does the principle of courtship put the bar too high for the formation of these relationships?

...and above all, what do these topics have to do with protein powder? Actually nothing. It's just that I'll be adding pictures to all of my blog posts from now on, and I had a can of protein powder handy. ;-)

But in case you're wondering, the rest of this is going to end up being a serious post. And now, having scared off 90% of my readership, let's continue...

I despise generalizations. People enjoy being unique, and don't like being put into boxes. When I say something like, "homeschoolers believe that courtship is the only appropriate environment for guy/girl relationships", I'm bound to step on toes and offend people. Even so, generalizations make for easy and concise commentary. Also, I'm lazy, so I'm just going to apologize in advance and charge through the china shop.

Many of you have probably read I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Boy Meets Girl, by Joshua Harris. In these books, he presents the view that secular dating fosters a "casual relationship" philosophy, to the detriment of "marriage for life". As a result, he advocates courtship instead. The primary differences between courtship and secular dating are the seriousness of the commitment and the involvement of third parties. A corollary to the seriousness of the commitment is the supposition that God has a special person in mind for each girl and each guy (those who will not remain single, that is). If you want a more complete understanding of the differences, feel free to pick up the books and read for yourself. Suffice it to say that courtship discourages casual interaction between guys and girls. This is often problematic for reasons I'll mention later on.

Okay, here come the generalizations (*cringe*). For the remainder of this post, I'll be assuming that:

1. (Most) Homeschoolers subscribe to a courtship mentality (hence dating is off the table).
2. (Most) Homeschoolers are conservative Christians

With these two criteria in place, let me explain a little about how I've been raised. Growing up, I've been taught that our allegiance belongs to God above all else. Everything we do should be for His glory. Marriage, while often in His plan for our lives, should not be our foremost concern. When God is ready for us to marry, He will make His choice for us clear. This is why dating isn't an option. It isn't our job isn't to find our helpmate, it's God's job. When he shows us who we are to marry, courtship will be the means of fostering the relationship, not casual dating.

I am one of those who subscribe to the above train of thought. It's simple, straight-forward, and God centered. Of course, as many of you may know, the forest is often easier to see than the trees. When it comes to walking through life from day to day, things can easily get muddled.

As explained above, it isn't our job to look for our future helpmate. The trouble is, men are naturally attracted to women, and vice-versa. I'm talking about infatuation here, not true love. When you're a Christian single, you can be especially attracted to godly members of the opposite sex. Here's where the rubber meets the road. If we internalize the fact that we aren't supposed to let these natural attractions rule the day, we've got to (through God's help), keep those inner feelings under control. Unfortunately, this suppression often manifests itself in "standoffishness" and "tightness" between godly young men and women at church and social functions.

Clearly, "standoffishness" and "tightness" aren't how brothers and sisters in Christ should be treating each other. And yet, this treatment is usually out of a genuine desire to protect and guard each others' hearts, a decidedly worthwhile goal. The thing is, if we've closed off our minds and hearts to each other, how can God break through when it's truly time to pursue a lifelong relationship?

This is where my experience ends, and where this post ends as well. I've failed to discover where we proceed past this point of seeming cold and unfeeling toward one another. Perhaps it's just me. Perhaps the vast majority of you don't notice any of this, and I need to do some serious praying and soul searching. Whatever the case, this is where I believe many single Christians are at, and I hope this post puts to words what many of you have been feeling.

I leave the floor open for your thoughts and comments. 

Some Fridays are good, and others...

It's really nice living on the outskirts of Corvallis, because, even during rush hour, the traffic isn't too bad. After work, I got a hair trim, walked back to the apartment to dump my stuff, drove down to the store, and began the business of filling my cart. I spent quite a bit on groceries this week, as I was stocking up on non-perishable items: canned soups, tuna, green beans, refried beans, and... yes... a 101 oz bottle of olive oil. It was expensive ($26), but economical compared with those smaller bottles. Besides, I do love my olive oil.

Check-out took awhile, but I got my shiny new Rewards Card, and was out of there.

I loaded up the car and slammed the trunk. It was then that I realized (in a mild panic) one very important detail. I had slammed the trunk after putting my car keys in the trunk. Don't ask me why, call it fate, call it Divine Will, call it what you like, the fact was, I'd locked pounds of frozen and refrigerated foodstuffs in a hot black car, on a hot black asphalt parking lot, on a beautiful, 75-degree day (the first such day of the year, lucky me). Yep, my goose was fried, or in the process of being fried, rather. Well, there was only one thing for it. I started sprinting for home, replete in jeans and a polo shirt (oh, did I mention it was warm out?). As I was running, several interesting thoughts crossed my mind. Thoughts such as, "you know, it's really quite astonishing how fast one runs when all of one's food is locked in one's trunk"--and--"I don't think the purpose of exercise is really to get fit. No, I think getting fit is a mere side-effect of exercise. The real reason for exercise is so you can take advantage of random opportunities for fresh air". Ah yes, I was definitely trying to look on the bright side of things at that point.

Well, I finally made it back to my apartment, grabbed the spare keys, and, in an attempt to salvage whatever was left of my pride, donned some shorts and a t-shirt, so it would look like I was out for a leisurely run. Okay, so maybe "leisurely" is the wrong word. Anyway, I bolted out the door with keys in hand and a vengeful stride under me. Thoughts of screaming vegetables and cringing cans of frozen juice were echoing through my crazed mind. The time read 6:15, so I knew I'd been gone for fifteen minutes, with another fifteen to go. After hurtling around corners and startling the occasional passersby, I finally regained the Fred Meyer parking lot. Yes, my car was still there, groceries and all (I tried not to think too much about the latter). The ride home was blissfully short. Upon arrival, I threw open the trunk, grabbed the bags, tossed them in the fridge, and cranked the temperature down as low as I could. I then returned to the car, and looked in the trunk for my keys... No keys.

Not to ruin the suspense, but I'd already carried them inside, as they'd fallen into one of the grocery bags. Still, I was mildly alarmed, and considered briefly a visit to a doctor for psychiatric evaluation. I may still visit that doctor, but for now, I'm planning on a wonderful protein-filled meal and making it an early night. That was enough excitement for one day, and possibly for the entire weekend.

And no, I didn't conjure this up as some sort of deranged publicity stunt or an attempt to break my writer's block. In fact, I'll have you know that I already had another post all planned and ready for execution. All things considered, I figured this one would serve as a better bookend to a rather dull work week.

Control Systems

Well, I'm having a hard time thinking of something to rant about. Could be writer's block, or perhaps something more sinister. I guess it's true that not every day includes a noteworthy event, not even for an über exciting guy like myself. 

One thing I'm working on after work is a control system for motorized vehicles. Think of it as a practical application of  math and physics. For example, suppose you have a boat with a heading of 30° at a constant velocity of 25 km/hour. If you want to change the heading, to, say, 120°, you've got to take into account the following:

1. The maximum thrust (acceleration) of the engine
2. The range of directions in which that force can be applied
3. The inertia of the boat in its current course
4. The water resistance and direction of flow

Essentially, the software I'm writing would be able to calculate the resulting trajectory of that boat as it's changing course.

Just something I'm working on to pass the evenings. Do any of you have past experience in this type of control system?

Emily

My sister has a strong influence on me. Very strong. All I could think about while preparing dinner was Emily.

As the refried beans plopped into the pan, I thought of Emily. As I poured a full cup of pasteurized milk, I thought of Emily. As I layered tortilla chips under my taco salad, I thought of Emily. As I chopped sweet bell peppers, I thought of Emily. She'd be so disappointed in me tonight. Maybe I should pick up some cayenne peppers in penance.

Then again, with her and her knife wielding skills, I may not get the opportunity to buy said peppers. Perhaps a locked door is the best policy tonight.

Math: Looking Back

I got my test scores back today. And... I've got some good news and some bad news.

The good news is that I won't have to retake MA528 (this semester's class). My score on the final was an 84% (B), which was sufficient to get me a final grade of a B (par for the course). Unfortunately, the C- in that first mid-term killed my chances of hitting my goal of a B+.

The bad news is this means I'm going to have to retake MA527 next Fall. That said, if I had to choose one class to retake, MA527 would have been my choice. The first time I took it, I didn't have time to really study the FFT (Fast Fourier Transform), which is a fundamental concept for wireless engineering. Knowledge of the FFT wasn't tested in the final exam, so naturally I skirted it in favor of topics that were being tested. A retake in the fall will allow me to study it further (me being an old veteran and all). ;-)

All in all, I've really enjoyed the challenge of school this past year. I came into the fall term a naive undergrad, with the most rudimentary understanding of the basics of calculus (one term in my senior year). I've come out of the spring semester thoroughly chewed up and spit out by the big boys in engineering academia. My final analysis is that I survived the year, did better on the outset than on the inset (improving from a B- in the first semester to a B in the second semester), and feel like next year I'll be solidly in the B+ zone.

Following are the topics covered this year (bolded items will be retaken next semester):

• Ordinary Differential Equations (systems of ODEs, Legendre's equation, Bessel's equation, Sturm-Liouville problems)
• Partial Differential Equations (1- and 2D Wave Equation, 1- and 2D Heat Equation, Laplacian)
• Laplace Transforms (solving systems of ODEs)
• Fourier Analysis (Fourier Series/Integrals/Transforms, Discrete and Fast Fourier Transform)
• Linear Algebra (Eigenvalues, Eigenvectors, Eigenbases, Diagonalization, Quadratic Forms)
• Vector Calculus (Green's Theorem, Divergence Theorem of Gauss, Stokes's Theorem)
• Complex Analysis (Cauchy's Integral Formula, Taylor Series, Laurent Series, Conformal Mapping)

Yeah, if I knew what kind of catch-up I'd be required to do, I would have thought twice before enrolling. Take heed all ye who want to transfer to a grad-level EE program after earning a CS degree. It will hurt.

Oh yes, and I voted today. As much as I hated to do it, I voted John Lim for governor. I would have much rather voted for a Ronald Reagan-type figure. You know, a person who can speak as well as hold conservative views regarding life, but then, it wasn't our luck to have such a person available. However, Mr. Lim is clearly the best option available to us in our present situation.